The Sea Minky, a kosher cruise liner, is suddenly hit by a hurricane out at sea and is shipwrecked on an island inhabited by cannibals. Only three passengers manage to survive the shipwreck and they just happen to be members of the same shul – Rabbi Levy, Morris the shul’s President and Lazarus the shul’s chazan. They are pulled out from the wreck and brought before the leader of the cannibals.
“We are looking forward to eating the three of you,” says the leader, “but before we do, it is our custom to grant you a last request. So could each of you tell me in turn what you would like to do before you die.”
Lazarus the chazan considers for a few minutes, then replies, “I love singing and there’s a special composition that I have always wanted to perform. But because it takes 15 minutes, I have never been given permission to sing it in my synagogue. I would like to sing it here, before I die.”
“Granted,” says the leader.
Rabbi Levy then says, “I love giving sermons but I have never been given permission to give my magnum opus sermon to my synagogue’s congregation. I’ve been working on it for years but I’ve not been allowed to give it because it could take up to two hours to do it justice. So I’d like to give this sermon here, before I die.”
“OK, granted,” says the leader. He then turns to Morris the President and says, “And what about you? What do you want?”
Morris the President immediately replies, “PLEASE EAT ME FIRST.”

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